12/8/2024
Turn with me to Proverbs 18:22. This is our verse to study and memorize this week.
Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains favor from the LORD.
To give us a little bit of context for this new section of Proverbs that we are starting here, let’s also read a few other key verses from this new section: Proverbs 19:8, 19:14, and 19:16.
Proverbs 19:8, 14, 16 He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; He who keeps understanding will find good.
14 House and wealth are an inheritance from fathers, But a prudent wife is from the LORD.
16 He who keeps the commandment keeps his soul, But he who is careless of conduct will die.
Introduction
This next section of Proverbs which we are now beginning goes from Proverbs 18:22-19:24. It moves from the primary focus of wisdom in our words to wisdom in the spheres of life’s relationships. It focuses on marriage, friends, family, rulers, and God. Within that it also deals with some key issues that affect those relationship—money, work, laziness, and anger. Within this new section of proverbs there are a few subsections. Yet, in the midst of them there are also overlapping connections that help unite it all together.
We will look at those connections more closely as we get to them, but in brief Proverbs 18:22 introduces everything by referencing the closest relationship one can have—a wife from God. These two elements of a wife from God are repeated in a bookend fashion in Proverbs 19:14. Proverbs 19:15-19:24 then add a nice long chiasm to that.
Within that first subsection Proverbs 18:23-19:9 moves from looking at marriage to looking at true friendship (in light of the deceptions of money). Proverbs 19:9-14 expands the look at relationships beyond friends to the broader relationships in society before returning to the family and marriage.
To tie all of this together, the desired outcome of being one who “finds good” occurs in both 18:22 and 19:8. In 18:22 it is in reference to finding a wife, and in 19:8 it is reference to getting wisdom and keeping understanding. To additionally connect the parts of our section together Proverbs 19:8 and 19:16 have nearly matching expressions. Proverbs 19:8 emphasizes one who “keeps understanding” (i.e. obeys it) and then Proverbs 19:16 emphasizes one who “keeps commandments.” All of this shows us that to “find good” in our relationships we need to hold onto God’s wisdom by obedience to it.
With that overview of our new section of Proverbs, let’s take a closer look now at Proverbs 18:22. Here we will see the closest of human relationships—marriage—as we pursue God’s wisdom for our lives.
22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing And obtains favor from the LORD.
A godly marriage is a blessing from God. This proverb emphasizes the blessing that marriage was designed by God to be.
At first reading this proverb could seem to be just a general statement that marriage is a good thing. It is true. Marriage between a man and a woman is good. It is the way things are supposed to be. But, the second part of the proverb gives us more of a context. This is not just a blanket celebration of every so-called marriage. This is not an exaltation of even the Ahab-and-Jezebel-kind-of-marriage where the pursuit of wickedness is increased through their wicked lives together. No. This is a celebration of the institution of marriage with its original design and purpose that God had for it when He ordained marriage and created Eve out of Adam’s rib. This is an exaltation of true marriage. That is what God blesses and approves. This is a praise of the kind of marriage that one has when they find the godly wife that God intended them to have who helps them in fulfilling God’s purpose for their marriage and lives. Not every marriage obtains the favor of God. Not every marriage is the blessing that it is supposed to be from God. People’s sinfulness often gets in the way of that, and can make it nearly the opposite. We are seeing that quite extensively in our world today where marriage is decimated by selfishness and wicked perversions.
With all of the manipulations, deceptions, selfishness’s, cold shoulders, pornography, adultery, and divorce going on it could seem that marriage might not actually be that good of a thing. All kinds of wicked perversions have quite often messed up the concept of marriage to make it the opposite of God’s design. With the failure of many marriages single-parenting, co-habitation, polygamy, poly-amory, same-sex marriage, and pedophilia have exploded.
Yet, this verse stands out against all sides of these problems and results. It unequivocally declares that finding a wife is a good thing. The marriage covenant that a man and woman undertake and fulfill before God has His favor and blessing. Marriage, in the way that He designed it, is indeed a good, righteous, blessed, enjoyable, helpful, and amazing reality. It carries His favor, approval, and help.
Perhaps, though, that is not your experience at all. Perhaps you saw a horrible example of marriage with parents, friends, or acquaintances. Perhaps you yourself did not have or are not having this kind of experience. Perhaps this all seems like a fairy-tale from Hollywood to make money. If that is true for you today then you need to step back and see God’s wisdom and design for true marriage.
On the other hand, perhaps you just feel rather ambivalent about marriage. Maybe you see that some marriages seem great, while others seem horrible, and many more just seem mediocre and hum-drum. Maybe your marriage has even seemed to fit all three of those categories at different times. This verse holds out the truth that God’s wisdom and design has that in it which can make it amazingly better—if you seek His design and live it. To have that blessing you and your spouse will need to realign your perspectives of marriage to match God’s wisdom and design for it.
The only reason our marriages are not a “good thing” with the amazing blessing of God’s favor on them is if we are not following God’s design for them in some way. If we have sin in our lives or our marriage we are not going to have God’s favor and blessing on it. If we are breaking our covenant of marriage in some way we are not going to have God’s favor and blessing on it. If we are ignoring God’s design and purpose for marriage we are not going to have His favor and blessing on it.
With all of this, the inevitable questions come. For someone who is looking for a wife, what is this wife like? What should be looked for in a wife by the godly, wise man of proverbs who wants to have a marriage that is a good thing and has the Lord’s favor?
Our proverb, in its essence, answers that. The kind of wife who will be a good thing for you is one who more than anything else wants her marriage to be what God wants it to be. If you both pursue making your marriage what God designed it to be, then you will have His blessing. You will have the amazing blessing of marriage, the good thing, that God designed it to be. You will have the “grace of life” as Peter termed it in 1 Peter 3:7. Doing things God’s way reaps the blessings that God designed them to have.
On the other hand, if couples stop pursuing God’s design for men and women in their marriage and start pursuing other ways and things then the good of marriage will be lost. Selfishness ruins it. Adultery and pornography ruins it. Evil behavior towards one another—deception, manipulation, anger, abuse, evil words, the silent treatment, etc. all turn marriage into a mockery of what it was intended to be.
It perverts it from being a one-flesh, helpful, united, God-exalting, God-serving, God-honoring kind of relationship.
Our current proverb does not go into all the details of what God’s design for marriage is. Yet, it does declare that God designed marriage as a good thing. By referencing God it also implies that this marriage is to be lived in light of Him and His design for it since He is the creator of it. What he designed and defines He also blesses with His favor. As part of His creation it is His blessing and favor that is worth having. Indeed, it is His blessing and favor which makes something a good thing. Similarly, it is living out marriage in His design and purpose for it that makes it so beneficial.
All that being said, this proverb begs the question—both from the person looking for a wife as well as for those who are already married—what is God’s design for marriage that would make it such a good thing? In short, what is this kind of marriage supposed to look like? What should we be pursuing to find? These things are what this proverb challenges us to meditate on and ponder carefully.
There is no way that one message can cover all of the details of the answer to such a question. However, what we will do is consider the big picture as well as some passages for further study. Many of those we will be able to look at more closely in the future as we examine other proverbs further along in our study of the book. Nonetheless, a big picture view will be helpful right now (especially considering that it may still take us a few years to reach Proverbs 31).
Within Proverbs that famous passage in Proverbs 31:10-31 provides the most important and lengthy guidance on what to pursue in finding a wife. That passage highlights so many ways that one’s godly wife can indeed be a “good thing.” Thus that passage would be one well worth studying carefully to see the kind of character and behavior most helpful in having a wife who will be a lifelong help and blessing. That passage culminates with the guiding principle of Proverbs 31:30. If you do nothing else, make that the essential element by which you find a wife. It will both help protect you from being deceived by outward beauty, as well as help guide you in the essential character element that is needed.
Proverbs 31:30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.
To have the favor and blessing of God on your marriage the woman you marry must have as her unerring pursuit that she wants to please God more than anything else. Just like the commands to the young man throughout Proverbs to live all of life in light of God with the “fear” of Him, so too the one that the wise person marries will also have that be their heart’s unbending commitment. Emotions, beauty, desires, and preferences will all be fickle and fleeting. If your wife is not committed to following God regardless of circumstances, feelings, finances or fears then your marriage will end up being a heartache. This must be true for both of you. If God is not first, and if doing things His way does not remain the firm commitment of your souls then your marriage will not remain a “good thing” with God’s favor and blessing upon it.
So this is the essential characteristic that our marriages must have. We must have God’s design and plan for life be what we are committed to. Otherwise sin will rush in and ruin it from God’s original purpose and goodness. Whereas if we stick to God’s purposes and designs it will indeed be good, and THE grace of life. It will be the good gift of God that He designed for us to have.
In some ways, this keeps kicking the can farther down the road. It still does not give us many details of what this kind of marriage is like. However, this principle, this commitment, is the foundation upon which everything else rests. If we are not committed to doing marriage God’s way and to seeing its goodness in His design then it really does not matter what the details are. Whenever they seem inconvenient, too hard, or when sin tempts us with something else we will just forget God and His design and think we know better. Whereas if we are committed in our covenant before God to do things His way, then we will do what is right and live in light of His wisdom and truth and trust Him regardless of how we feel or what others tell us.
Thus, the first thing to understand and to commit to is to God’s way of doing marriage. Indeed, that is what the marriage covenant before God in marriage was intended to be! Unfortunately, many people forget their vow before God and ignore these realities. Make it the determination of your heart that you will take your marriage vow seriously. If you are not yet married, make it your determination that you will only marry someone who views marriage as it really is with its commitment before God to follow Him in His purposes for life and marriage.
If you are already married, then make sure that this is what your heart is continually being re-committed to. To be able to do any of this it will require that you search out knowing from Scripture the details of God’s design for marriage, and it will require that apply that to your marriage. Will you? Without that commitment in your heart it will be very easy to give up when the next argument or struggle occurs. It will be all to easy to slip back into old sinful routines that can so easily make our marriages so much less than God’s perfect, good design for them. Do not let that happen. Instead commit to knowing and following God’s design. Talk with your spouse. Work through the issues. Commit together to having your marriage be what God intended. Then enjoy the goodness of God’s blessing on it.
If marriage or re-marriage does not seem to be a likely prospect for you, you can still understand the importance here of determining to live in God’s design for all of life and through that reap His blessing, help, and favor. All of our relationships need to be guided by God’s wisdom and design. You can also take the importance of God’s design in marriage and make it your commitment to encourage, teach, and disciple others in the blessing and reality of marriage before God. There is always a need for pointing people back to God’s design and purposes in marriage. Marriages are breaking down all around us and of those that remain so many are so far less than what God intends. We can all make a difference in this by pointing people to God’s perfect design and purposes. Titus 2 commands older women to do this. Marriages would be much better in the church if they obeyed and taught what that passage says to love your husbands and children with a warm affection.
Scriptural Example: In Scripture we see an example of this proverb in God’s creation of Eve for Adam and in His institution of marriage. Two passages in Genesis describe this. Genesis 1:26-31 gives the big picture.
Genesis 1:26-31 Then God said, “Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” 27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 God blessed them; and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.” 29 Then God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you; 30 and to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the sky and to every thing that moves on the earth which has life, I have given every green plant for food”; and it was so. 31 God saw all that He had made, and behold, it was very good.
God made man and women together in His image. We are to reflect His goodness and carry out His will. In God’s original creation of us He blessed us with marriage. He designed us to be fruitful and multiply. He gave us authority over His creation to steward and rule it in His name. Genesis 2:20-25 zooms in to the more personal realities that marriage was designed to be.
Genesis 2:20-25 The man gave names to all the cattle, and to the birds of the sky, and to every beast of the field, but for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him. 21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. 22 The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. 23 The man said, “This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” 24 For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.
Adam did not have a helper. He did not have a companion suitable for him in carrying out God’s purposes for him. He was alone. So God made him a wife. God made Eve for him out of his own rib. She was bone of his bone and flesh of his own flesh. Like he had been, she was made in the image of God. God’s design for marriage is for a man to leave his parents and to be joined together uniquely with his wife in marriage. They are to become one flesh. The wife joins the husband in carrying out God’s purpose for their lives. She is his help-meet. They become one in serving God together.
That is God’s design for marriage. It is to be carried out in purity and holiness before God without shame. It is to be a marriage of oneness: oneness in purpose, oneness in mission, oneness in worship, oneness in working together, oneness in knowing the other person and in being known by them, oneness in serving and helping, oneness in multiplying and filling the earth, and oneness in ruling God’s creation.
Then Genesis 3 occurred. Sin entered into the picture. They abdicated their rule to Satan. Eve was deceived and Adam willfully disobeyed. They defied God and brought all of creation under the slavery and bondage of sin. Everything in creation was infected. Their relationship with God was broken. Their relationship with each other was marred. Adam blamed God and Eve for the sin. Eve blamed Satan. God righteously judged them all for their sin. Everything sinful was cut off from God, from His holiness, and from His life-sustaining sustenance. Thus death entered the world.
But God, being rich in His mercy made a way of redemption. Initially it was pictured in the slain animals whose skins covered their nakedness and shame. Ultimately it was completed through God’s prophesied redeemer: Jesus the Messiah. Jesus, God incarnate, lived perfectly and took on the judgment of all those who truly place their faith in Him. He bore that punishment on the cross. He died in our place. Then He conquered sin and death, and gives to us His eternal life. He raises us spiritually from the dead and restores us in relationship to the Father. He promises to finish this resurrection when He returns, completes His work of redemption in this world, and re-creates it.
In the meantime, while we are marred by sin, God’s original purpose and design for marriage remains the same. The problem is that our sin often gets in the way of our perfectly carrying it out. It is only as we walk by His wisdom and strength that we can return to His purposes for it. But as we do, it is indeed good. It does indeed receive His blessing and favor. It is the grace—the undeserved gift—of life. Because of our sin we do not deserve the blessing of marriage, or any other good gift that we experience. But in Christ God gives us His good gifts and enables us to enjoy them all—whether they be marriage, family, His creation, food, friendship, music, or the other delights of stewarding God’s world well.
While Adam and Eve’s example gives us a “pre-fall-into-sin” picture of God’s purpose in marriage, we have at least two other examples in Scripture that are particularly worth noting. The first of these is found in the book of Ruth. In the Hebrew ordering of the Old Testament the book of Ruth comes right after the book of Proverbs. Thus, it comes right after the description of the virtuous or excellent woman of Proverbs 31. To make the connection even stronger, that Hebrew expression for the “virtuous woman” that is found in Proverbs 31:10 at the beginning of that section is the exact same Hebrew expression that Boaz used to describe Ruth in Ruth 3:11. The masculine version of that is also used in Ruth 2:1 to describe Boaz himself. Thus in Boaz and Ruth we see a picture of two individuals who feared and served the Lord uniting in marriage together.
Their marriage was indeed a beautiful and good thing. Both Ruth and Boaz’s character are seen in the book in the ways that they lived first and foremost for God. Then they united together to continue doing that. Ruth would not desert her mother-in-law. She sacrificially loved and cared for her. She worked hard to provide for them in what was to her a foreign land. She pursued God’s law and showed her trust in Him by asking for a kinsman redeemer when that opportunity came.
Meanwhile Boaz graciously helped provide for Ruth in her work, and then when he was asked to be the kinsman redeemer he made sure to do things the right way. He did not take advantage of her. He followed God’s Word completely. He gave the nearer kinsman the required opportunity first. Then he completely provided for both Ruth and Naomi when that was refused. He married Ruth and God blessed them with a son, Obed. In God’s perfect sovereignty Obed became the grandfather of David the king, and an ancestor of Jesus the perfect redeemer.
That leads us to the second example of marriage: Jesus and the church. In Ephesians 5 Paul, under the direct inspiration of God, lays out the responsibility and roles of husbands and wives. In the midst of this he makes a comparison that gives us the perfect example of marriage to follow. Many of the marriages that we may have personally seen in life have glaring problems. Even in the Bible many of the marriages that are presented have huge problems that make them not worth imitating. Quite a number of other marriages in Scripture have so little written about them that it’s hard to learn much from them for sure. However, God has given us something better. He has given us a perfect example in Jesus. Notice both the details of a godly marriage and how Jesus perfectly fulfills them with the church.
Ephesians 5:22-33 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her, 26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND SHALL BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. 32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband.
This whole section on the husband and wife is intertwined with Jesus’ love for the church. It gives us our roles, our attitudes, and our purpose. If we faithfully follow it, it will also protect us from the pitfalls that our flesh might pervert it into.
Marriage is not about having our selfishness fulfilled. Marriage is not about jockeying for authority, manipulating, and getting one’s way. Marriage is not about making someone else submit. Marriage is not about a battle of the sexes. Marriage is not even about learning to give and take or about two individuals somehow learning to work together. Nor is marriage about the pursuit of fun.
Marriage is about following God’s perfect design. Marriage is about wives submitting to, respecting, and warmly loving their husbands as they together pursue knowing, serving, and loving God. Marriage is about husbands loving their wives sacrificially in doing what is best for them as they together pursue knowing, serving, and loving God. Marriage is about holiness and helping one another glorify God the way that He deserves to be honored, praised and served. Marriage is about no longer being two, but being one flesh as you together worship God in all that you do.
Christ perfectly shows us how our marriages are to work. He perfectly loves and leads the church. He perfectly sacrificed to do what was best and redeem the church to make her holy. He perfectly enables her to serve God. Meanwhile, the church is to faithfully follow Jesus and do all that it can in lovingly serving Him to accomplish His work of sharing redemption to the world and making disciples.
If our marriages work like this, with loving leadership towards what is right, holy, and best and with faithful following and helping work together towards God’s purposes for our lives then their will be a unity, a working through issues, a healthy communication, and a loving meeting of one another’s needs. Their will be an enjoyment of life together. When sin occurs there will be repentance, forgiveness, and a refocus on serving God and helping each other in one another’s weaknesses. There will be a harmony and purpose to our marriages. The joys will be doubled and the sorrows halved. There will be a goodness, a wholesomeness, a sweet fellowship, and a deep friendship. There will be a harmony of unity that stems from truly being one flesh. That kind of marriage will indeed be a “good thing.” That kind of marriage will indeed have God’s favor and blessing.
Is that what your marriage looks like? Take time to examine it by the truth of God’s design for it. Be humble enough to let God transform it. Repent of any sinful perspectives and ways of doing things that have become a part of your marriage. Recommit to carrying out your marriage God’s way regardless of what your spouse does. With God’s enablement give to your marriage 100% no matter what your spouse does. We cannot make our spouse or anyone else do the right thing from the heart. That is not our right or responsibility. We can and must continue to lovingly help and encourage them in any way that we are able towards God’s purpose for their lives and our marriage. Regardless of their response, we can still do all that God would have us do.
Proverb in Comparison: When we compare this proverb with the rest of Scripture see that God talks about His design for marriage in Genesis 1 and 2, Proverbs 31, Ruth, and Ephesians 5 as we have already mentioned. He also adds a fair bit more in Proverbs 5:15-23, Colossians 3:18-19, 1 Peter 3:1-7, Titus 2:3-5, and 1 Corinthians 7:2-5. There is also an often forgotten book of the Bible with 8 chapters in it devoted to the beauty and goodness of marital love: the Song of Solomon.
We do not have time to explain all of those passages as they deserve, but they all contain very important principles and guidance for our marriages. For a fuller consideration of the Proverbs 5:15-23 passage you can go back and listen to lessons 36 and 37 of our Proverbs series which are on the church website. If you are married, why not set aside some time to read the Song of Solomon together? That might give you some perspective on part of God’s design for goodness in marriage. For the other passages let’s read them together now so that we can hear at least hear their truths and be aware of them (or reminded of them).
Colossians 3:18-19 Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. 19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them.
1 Peter 3:1-7 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, 2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; 4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God. 5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands; 6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. 7 You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
Titus 2:3-6 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, 4 so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored. 6 Likewise urge the young men to be sensible;
1 Corinthians 7:2-5 But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. 3 The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
So many issues in marriage would be resolved if husbands and wives simply loved their spouses from the heart enough to obey God’s commands and design for marriage in these ways. According to God’s design no Christian marriage should fit in with the world’s stereotype of wives always having headaches. According to God’s design no Christian spouse should know what it means to be given the world’s stereotypical silent treatment or “cold shoulder.” According to God’s design no Christian marriage should have verbally or physically abusive treatment. According to God’s design no Christian marriage should have manipulation or deception in it. None of those things are lovingly and sacrificially serving one another. None of those things are obedience to God. None of those things receive God’s favor and blessing. None of those things characterize God’s good design for marriage.
Truth in Connection: So as we seek to apply our proverb to our lives if you want your marriage to be a “good thing” and to have God’s favor, then confess any of these sins. Turn from them. Commit to following God’s design. Find ways to love your spouse, to understand them, and to help them. There are so many different ways that this can be done. Communicate with them. Look out more for their needs than your own. Do not look for excuses to be selfish. That will not benefit you or your marriage. Truly love them sacrificially. Make serving God your primary purpose. If you do, that will end up being the most amazing blessing in your marriage that you could imagine. Truly live together as one flesh in serving God physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, and in every other way.
Likewise, if you are not married, then do not settle for anything less than a wife who truly wants God’s design for her marriage and life. If you find a wife like this and together make it your commitment to follow God’s design you have found an amazingly good thing. You will have the favor of God Himself.
All this being said, if your sin has not been taken care of by faith in what Jesus did on the cross on your behalf, then there is no way that you will be able to truly walk in God’s design for marriage. You may be able to imitate some aspects of His design, and things will generally be better for your marriage the more you do that. But ultimately your sin will still get in the way and there is no way that you will be able to fulfill God’s ultimate purposes for your life. We can only do that as we are forgiven of our sins, cleansed, and enabled to love, honor, and live for God in the way that He designed.
But even worse than not enjoying marriage as God designed it, if we do not repent of our sin and trust in Jesus we will still die in our sins and receive God’s just and holy judgment. We must turn from our sin to God as our Lord and Savior. His way is right for everything. Not just for marriage. Our sin is a defiance of Him and all righteousness. In His mercy and grace He has extended His love to the world through Jesus Christ. Come to personally know His love, forgiveness, and life. Trust in Him. Then you will be enabled to begin to sacrificially love and serve others like He has done for you. In true fellowship and communion with God we are enabled to have truer fellowship and communion with our spouses as we together serve Him.
May your marriage be all that God designed it to be. May we look to Jesus as our model for love and service in our marriages. May our marriages reflect to the world around us the amazing love that Jesus has for us. May they point people to Jesus as He designed them to do. Is your marriage what God designed it to be? Is it a good thing and full of God’s favor and blessing?
Conclusion
If you have any questions on any of this or want help in coming to know Jesus as your Lord and Savior please come talk with us. We are available. Let’s pray.
© 2024, Kevin A. Dodge, All rights reserved.
Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Bible® (NASB),Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. www.Lockman.org
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