EXTRA! Ideas for Adults – Navigating Family Conflict – Session 4

1 month ago 19

Date: November 3, 2024

Jacob and Esau: Family Rivalry

The Point: Showing humility is critical to restoring a broken relationship.

Get Into the Study

Share this as you discuss The Bible Meets Life:

In early October, anti-Hamas speaker Mosab Hassan Yousef attended an event at Harvard University. Yousef spoke of the complex nature of the current Israeli-Hamas conflict and tried to diagnose why so many Harvard students have become so “radically” anti-Israel, stating that the well-educated with no moral compass can be swayed to any ideology. In fact, while Yousef was speaking, an anti-Israel vigil was held on campus, where participants honored the Palestinians killed during the “year of genocide.”

Yousef is quite familiar with Hamas’ workings, as he is a former Palestinian militant known as the “Green Prince” who defected to Israel in 1997. Working with the Israeli intelligence agency Shin Bet, he helped prevent terrorist attacks, including suicide bombings. Since seeking asylum in the United States in 2007, Yousef said that he has “lost his family and feeling of security” after choosing to spend his life speaking against terrorism and Hamas. As Yousef’s father, Sheikh Hassan Yousef is a co-founder of Hamas, his defection and subsequent fleeing of his native country have caused a deep familial divide.

Not all conflicts are as pronounced as this, but ideological differences and expectations can break apart even the closest familial ties. Not all divides are easy to bridge, but believers should seek to follow the will of God above the will of man. Reconciliation can only come when people are willing to humble themselves.

Get Into the Study [Option from the Adult Leader Guide]

In advance, play a video clip showing some famous siblings from movies or TV. Then ask Question #1.

Live It Out

Share the following as you discuss the application ideas in Live it Out:

Among many other issues during World War II, Nazi soldiers were known to appropriate works of art from museums and families during their occupation of European cities. Many people who fled their homes also left behind artwork that was seized by German forces, including Jewish art collectors Adalbert and Hilda Parlagi.

The Parlagis owned an 1865 painting by Claude Monet entitled Bord de Mer (Seaside) that they were forced to leave behind when they fled Vienna in 1938. Third Reich officials took the Monet and several other paintings that the couple had left in their Viennese storage facility. Bord de Mer was later auctioned off in 1941.

In 2017, the Commission for Looted Art in Europe, a nonprofit organization, helped the Parlagi family’ heirs track the painting. The FBI became involved in 2021, when the stolen painting was tracked to an art dealer in New Orleans. The painting was recovered in 2023 when it appeared in a gallery in Houston. It will finally be returned to the family after 80 years.

Divisions, hatred, and rivalries can grow and cause harm when allowed to fester. Years of strife and going without can follow, leading to further emotional or physical hurt. As believers, we should seek peace with those around us, particularly our family. It’s never too late to restore relationships to how they should be, and God is glorified as we seek Him in righting old wrongs.

EXTRA was written by Emily Duncan, a Southern California native currently living in West Georgia with her husband, daughter, and two dogs. God saved her from Wicca when she was sixteen, and she now serves alongside her youth pastor husband as a girls’ leader at New Hope First Baptist Church in Dallas, GA. Emily spends most of her time tangled in yarn while crocheting or reading outside in the hammock.

Additional Questions

Icebreaker

Baby? Oldest? “Black sheep?” “Golden child?” – What was your “place” in your family of origin?
What’s a TV family you grew up watching, and what were their relationships like?
If the story of Jacob and Esau were a soap opera, what would you name it? Why?
What effect does birth order have on sibling relationships?
Who is that person in your life who always has your back, and you trust implicitly?
Who are some siblings from movies or TV you found entertaining?

Genesis 27:35-37; 41

When have you seen someone’s self-centeredness lead to pain for others?
When have you seen internal rivalry lead to dysfunction in a group?
Life is filled with unfairness, even within our families. How can you maintain healthy, loving relationships when what seems to be unfair persists?
How can we fight the pull of selfishness in the important relationships in our lives?
Why is selfishness so destructive to family relationships?
Do you find yourself sympathizing more with Jacob or Esau in this conflict? Why?

Genesis 33:1-4

How can we display humility to those we have hurt or wronged?
How does humility engender forgiveness?
What consequences could have resulted had the two brothers not reconciled?
What role can humility play in rebuilding a relationship?
Where do you see a great need for humility and reconciliation in our world today?
When have you had to step outside your comfort zone to seek reconciliation?
When have you been pleased to see two people or groups reconciled?
What role does humility play in reconciliation and rebuilding?

Genesis 33:8-11

What are the consequences for someone who refuses to reconcile?
What can we learn from Jacob & Esau’s exchange?
When is a price just too high to restore a friend or family relationship?
When have you seen a broken relationship fully restored to a place of mutual joy?
In what ways does it require humility on both parts, to work through conflict and seek a restored relationship?
How does pride hinder opportunities for reconciliation?