John 13:36–38
Simon Peter said to him, ‘Lord, where are you going?’
Jesus answered him, ‘Where I am going you cannot follow me now, but you will follow afterwards.’
Peter said to him, ‘Lord, why can I not follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.’
Jesus answered, ‘Will you lay down your life for me? Truly, truly, I say to you, the cock will not crow till you have denied me three times.’
John 18:15–18, 25–27
Simon Peter followed Jesus, and so did another disciple. Since that disciple was known to the high priest, he entered with Jesus into the court of the high priest, but Peter stood outside at the door. So the other disciple, who was known to the high priest, went out and spoke to the servant girl who kept watch at the door, and brought Peter in.
The servant girl at the door said to Peter, ‘You also are not one of this man’s disciples, are you?’ He said, ‘I am not.
Now the servants and officers had made a charcoal fire, because it was cold, and they were standing and warming themselves
Peter also was with them, standing and warming himself. . . . So they said to him, ‘You also are not one of his disciples, are you?’
He denied it and said, ‘I am not.’
One of the servants of the high priest, a relative of the man whose ear Peter had cut off, asked, ‘Did I not see you in the garden with him?’ Peter again denied it, and at once a cock crowed.
John 21:15–22
When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?’
He said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.’
He said to him, ‘Feed my lambs.’
He said to him a second time, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love me?’
He said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.’
He said to him, ‘Tend my sheep.’
He said to him the third time, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love me?’
Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, ‘Do you love me?’ and he said to him, ‘Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.’
Jesus said to him, ‘Feed my sheep. Truly, truly, I say to you, when you were young, you used to dress yourself and walk wherever you wanted, but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will dress you and carry you where you do not want to go.’ (This he said to show by what kind of death he was to glorify God.) And after saying this he said to him, ‘Follow me.’
Peter turned and saw the disciple whom Jesus loved following them, the one who had been reclining at table close to him and had said, ‘Lord, who is it that is going to betray you?’ When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, ‘Lord, what about this man?’
Jesus said to him, ‘If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!’[p 131]
A lesson about self-reliance
The last journey that we will consider reminds us that a journey of faith with Jesus is lifelong. The Saviour does not only save people and then leave them to get on with life as best they can. He carries on his work in all of those he has redeemed until the day when he takes them to himself in that place that he is preparing for them (John 14:2–3). And for each follower of the Lord Jesus Christ there will be many lessons to learn along that road.
One of the many lessons we can learn from the experience of the Apostle Peter is moderately easy to agree with in theory, but much more difficult to face when we discover its truth in practical experience. The lesson is this: however grateful to the Lord we may be for what he has done for us, and however determined we may be to love, obey and follow him, our love and determination are not enough in themselves to keep us following him as we should. Indeed we have hidden weaknesses within us that, were we dependent solely on our own resources, would easily ruin the whole procedure completely.
Of course, all believers will unhesitatingly agree that we are still imperfect and sin from time to time; but almost unconsciously many of us assume that, given adequate determination, care and effort, we can manage by ourselves to overcome or suppress our sins and achieve the desired standard of holiness. It just is not true. Sin has sapped our strength and damaged our moral fibre more than we think; and it can be a bitter experience when repeated failure makes us face this unpleasant and disturbing fact.
The great Apostle Paul openly confesses the feeling of utter wretchedness that came over him when he made this discovery. ‘I myself serve the law of God’, he says, ‘with my mind’; for intellectually he saw clearly that serving God was the only sensible way of living. ‘I delight’, he also says, ‘in the law of God, in my inner being’; for living to please God was to him no cold, merely intellectual activity. He delighted in it: it moved him emotionally. Moreover, he says, ‘For I have the desire to do what is right’—his determination to live a holy life was driven by an iron will. But all in vain! All too often practice turned out to be the opposite of intention. ‘For I do not do the good I want,’ he wails, ‘but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing’ (Rom 7:15–25). Intellect, emotion and will, all combined,[p 132] and put to the task of living a holy, Christ-like life, were found to be seriously inadequate. It was a bitter experience for Paul.
God, however, had known it from the very start; and when Paul discovered his bankruptcy, God pointed him to the provision he himself had made so that even a bankrupt Paul might be able to follow, love and obey the Lord Jesus as he should (see Rom 8). And so it will be with us. Using Peter as his object lesson, Christ will now point out to us our inadequacy; and if only we are prepared to take Christ seriously and believe what he says about us, we shall be ready to learn about, and then lay hold of, his provision which brings holiness realistically within our grasp.
Peter: our object lesson
When the Lord remarked that he was going away, and that where he was going his disciples could not come, Peter considered the matter for a few seconds and decided that our Lord was exaggerating things unnecessarily. ‘Lord,’ said Peter, ‘where exactly are you going?’ Our Lord replied, ‘Where I am going you cannot follow me now, but you will follow later’ (John 13:36).
But Peter was not satisfied, for he felt that the Lord’s remarks implied a defect in his courage. ‘But, Lord,’ he said, ‘why can’t I follow you now? I will lay down my life for you.’ He meant every word, for in the past years there had grown up in Peter’s heart a deep and warm devotion to the Lord Jesus, and as far as he knew he was perfectly willing to lay down his life for him, if necessary. Certainly he was no Judas; and perhaps in Peter’s way of thinking the exposure of Judas’s insincerity and treachery had made him feel all the more certain that he would never treat the Lord in this despicable way, but would follow him, if need be, to prison and to death. As far as he knew, then, his devotion to Christ was not to be doubted. The trouble was that he did not know himself anywhere near well enough. Actually, there was in Peter’s personality a hidden weakness; and when, in a few hours’ time, by the sinister machinations of the devil himself, circumstances exerted unbearable pressure on that weakness, Peter’s devotion was going to collapse completely and he would deny the Lord with oaths and curses. This the Lord now had to tell him and expose to him his weakness, as earlier he had exposed Judas’s treachery.[p 133]
Peter's basic mistake
Of course, we must not confuse Peter’s weakness with Judas’s treachery. Peter’s weakness was the weakness of a man who had been bathed all over, had experienced the regeneration of the Holy Spirit, had been made completely clean (13:10–11). Judas’s treachery was the treachery, not merely of an unregenerate man, but of a man who was led by, and eventually possessed by, the devil (13:2, 10–11, 18, 27). Peter’s weakness would eventually be overcome; Judas’ treachery would never be reversed.
On the other hand, Peter’s weakness would not be overcome automatically. The only way for any of us as believers to overcome our weaknesses is, first to be made to face them and to admit they are there, and then to repent of them and to seek the Lord’s grace and the power of the Holy Spirit to overcome them. Had Peter been willing therefore, to listen to the Lord Jesus and to accept that what he said was true, Peter could have spared himself enormous anguish and sorrow. And we might wonder, if we did not know the obtuseness of our own hearts, why Peter did not reply to the Lord Jesus in the following fashion: ‘Lord, I cannot believe it. I am not that kind of man. I don’t think that I have this weakness that you talk of; but if I have—and you know best—then please tell me now how I may overcome it, and be saved from this ugly thing that you say I am going to do.’ If he had said that, the Lord Jesus would most certainly have shown him how he could have avoided the oncoming fall.
But no, Peter could not believe it about himself, not even when the Lord told him. He thought he had resources enough of courage and determination to make any sacrifice that was necessary in the course of his devotion to the Lord. The fact was, he had not. Therefore, he had to learn the hard and bitter way that the Lord knew him and his personality better than he did himself. The weakness that the Lord said he saw in him was really there, and must be brought to the surface before it could be healed. If, then, the only way to make Peter face his weakness, and thus to learn to overcome it, was to allow him to come into circumstances where he would fail, and deny the Lord, then the Lord’s love was such that he would allow Peter to come into those circumstances and make that appalling discovery. For, as 13:1 reminds us, ‘Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end’; and his love was[p 134] determined to make Peter eventually perfectly holy, whatever the cost and the price should be.
The certainity of Peter's restoration
But Christ was certain, of course, that Peter would eventually be restored and triumph. ‘Where I am going you cannot follow me now,’ he said to Peter, ‘but you shall follow afterwards.’ And so Peter did. Though his courage left him, and he denied and deserted Christ in order to escape suffering in the high priest’s court and at the cross, he was afterwards restored, then served and followed Christ magnificently for many years. Finally, suffering a death like the Lord’s, he went home to glory.
And we should not fail to notice this important matter: when the breakdown came, as our Lord predicted, and Peter failed to follow the Lord in his suffering as he should have done, it must have been a tremendous source of encouragement and new hope for Peter to remember what the Lord said before it all happened: ‘You cannot follow me now, but you will follow afterwards.’ All through the ups and downs of the rest of Peter’s life, he would constantly have repeated the Lord’s words to himself over and over again, giving them their fullest meaning. He had not yet been allowed to follow the ascended Lord bodily into the glory of the Father’s presence in heaven. But there was no doubt that he would one day. Christ had said he would; and his promise would not fail. And what is more, entry into the glory of the Father’s presence in heaven, and the direct sight of the blessed Lord Jesus, would instantaneously complete Peter’s sanctification and complete it forever beyond danger of any further collapse. This too, then, our Lord let Peter know by implication, before he fell. The certainty of this promise and the courage it gave him enabled him to face his failure, to come back, and follow the Lord devotedly for the rest of his life. And since Christ has no favourites, all who trust him may take this same promise to themselves.
Peter's restoration
Let’s come now to those other lessons that stand at the end of John’s Gospel, lessons that would help prepare Peter for a life of service[p 135] and finally for his own death. The risen Christ and his disciples had just finished their breakfast on the beach. Now Peter was to be reappointed. First of all he had been a fisher of men (Matt 4:19), now he is going to be appointed as a shepherd of the sheep.
Listen to how the Lord searched the man’s heart. Calling him by his original name, he said, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love me?’
‘Yes, Lord,’ he said, ‘you know that I love you.’
He said to him, ‘Tend my lambs.’ Then a second time he said to him, ‘Simon, son of John, do you love me?’
He said to him, ‘Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.’
Jesus said to him, ‘Tend my sheep.’
When he asked him for the third time, Peter said, ‘Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you. Didn’t you know before? I didn’t know my own heart but you knew, Lord. You told me that I would deny you. I didn’t think it was possible, but you knew. You know everything, and you know, Lord, that I love you.’
And this was not boasting, for where would Peter have been without the Lord? This was not the pride of an eminently successful and spiritual man; it was the humble tribute of a sheep, who would have perished forever apart from Christ’s work as a shepherd.
‘I love you Lord’, he said. ‘I would have been lost without you.’
‘Then, Peter, you’re just the man to feed my sheep. I don’t want men who feel themselves superior, I want men who have had personal experience of me as their shepherd, and are prepared to mediate that to their brothers and sisters when they go astray. That’s who I want.’
Even in the most intimate and exalted moments the Lord was ever a realist. There were lessons to teach Peter about not lording it over the flock. He said to him, ‘Feed my lambs and tend my sheep.’
That is how Peter was able to say in his first letter,
So I exhort the elders among you, as a fellow elder and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, as well as a partaker in the glory that is going to be revealed: shepherd the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly; not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock. And when the chief Shepherd appears, you will receive the unfading crown of glory.’ (1 Pet 5:1–4)[p 136]
This is something perhaps that will be better considered without a multiplicity of words from me. Rather, in the quiet of our hearts, let each of us say to the Lord, ‘In my service for you, Lord, what is my motive? Do I love using the big stick and the rod, and fencing people in with walls, or have I learned the value that you place on an individual sheep because you did so much for me, one of the worst of your sheep? Lord, you know that I do love you, for I would have been lost without you, my testimony would have been ruined and I wouldn’t have lasted five minutes. And because I’ve learned how valuable it is to have a shepherd who loves like that, and because I love my shepherd, I would count it a great privilege to be allowed in my turn to look after your sheep in the same fashion.’
The limits of a shepherd
There on the beach, Christ added, ‘But before we finish, Peter, you need to learn that there are certain limits to your work. You may not be thinking of it now, but that day will come when you will have to lay it down. When you were young, you used to dress yourself and go wherever you wanted. You saw that there was a job to be done and you got up and did it. Wasn’t that a lovely thing to be able to do? But when you are old, you will lose that power. Others will dress you and carry you where you do not want to go.’
Finishing well
Christ was still the shepherd, putting signposts along the journey so that his sheep wouldn’t get worried and feel he had lost his way in the difficulties of old age. ‘Peter,’ he says, ‘I want you to know that I have a service for you to do now when you are young, and I have a service for you when you are old and can no longer do what you formerly did.’ In Peter’s case it would be a question of persecution and imprisonment. His service would come to an abrupt end, which wasn’t the kind of thing he’d choose. ‘But Peter,’ he says, ‘I want you to know that you’ll glorify me in that too.’
This should come as a comfort to Christian brothers and sisters who are growing older. Once you loved to be active in the Lord’s work; you sought out the sheep, you did your visitation, you helped in numberless ways. When you saw a job to be done, you did it. You[p 137] are growing older now, and you don’t have the strength. You can’t concentrate as you used to and read your Bible, and you can’t get out to meet with the Lord’s people as often as you would like to, and it seems a frustration. You begin to think, ‘What use am I to the Lord?’
What use are you to the Lord! When you have done your little bit of shepherding, you are still his sheep. You are always valuable and your value will not decrease. He values you, not because of the work you did, but because of who you are. You are his sheep right to the very end, even all the way home to glory.
Can you still be a shepherd? You can glorify God by showing some of our youngsters the glory of a life that not only started well but ended well. It’s easy when you have learned the theory to get up and speak, isn’t it? It’s quite another thing to have done fifty years on the road and then to go home triumphantly, glorifying God. That is the biggest test of all shepherds—the way they finish their journey.
Shepherding, not controlling
Shepherding, not controlling ‘But, Peter,’ said Christ, ‘I want you to remember that there are limits to your work even as a shepherd.’
Peter turned round and saw John following them, and he said, ‘Lord, what about this man?’
The Lord said, ‘What is that to you?’
That was blunt, wasn’t it?
‘What John does is nothing to do with you, Peter. That’s my responsibility. If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!’ (see John 21:22). He wanted Peter to shepherd the sheep, but he didn’t want Peter controlling the other servants, and the church would have done well to learn the lesson. The human heart is a curious thing. Sometimes we’d rather control the servant than look after the sheep. What great organizations the church has built for controlling servants.
So the Lord said, ‘Please will you leave that thing to me, Peter?’
Peter did as he was told. You’ll never read once in all the Acts of the Apostles that Peter attempted to tell another servant what to do. Some had a go at telling Peter, of course. When he preached the gospel to the Gentiles, they hauled him up and said, ‘Give an account of this’ (Acts 11). But you will never find Peter interfering, not even on that great occasion when Paul and Barnabas fell out and[p 138] couldn’t agree on methods in the Lord’s work. You don’t read that Peter stepped in and said, ‘Look here, Barnabas, this won’t do.’ He hadn’t authority to do anything; that was the Lord’s business, and servants must be left free to be immediately responsible to their Lord.
That is important when thinking about the principles that guide the church. We’ve got enough to do without going outside our tasks. Shepherds must know what their tasks are, and what they are not. Let us remember, please, the sufferings of Christ. What did Christ die for? That he might forgive our sins, yes, but for another reason— he died ‘that he might be Lord’ (Rom 14:9), not you or me. The art of the shepherd is not to get between the sheep and the Lord. It is to bring the sheep to the Lord. It is far more important in daily life that believers make their own decisions before him. The valuable thing is in trying to please the Lord, and if the person we are concerned about is honestly trying to please him we can leave it there, and the Lord will guide. Let us learn our limitations, lest with very good desire we get between the sheep and the Lord, and the sheep merely do things because we say so, instead of their personal decision as free men and women before the Lord. It will take tremendous wisdom and grace for elders in particular to know where to draw the line.
These were the lessons that the Lord taught Peter after he had restored him and reappointed him to feed his sheep. ‘Feed my sheep’, he had said to Peter those three times. And, having been taught by the great shepherd through many years’ experience, Peter says, ‘As the Lord made himself an example to me, may God give you grace to make yourselves examples to the flock.’
Peter had been appointed to his task by the risen Lord, but it was his own experience of the Lord’s loving care and restoration after dismal failure that prepared him, in his turn and for his time, to shepherd the Lord’s people. He never forgot how the Lord had been his shepherd, and those who were in his care reaped the benefit.[p 139]
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