10/6/2024
Turn with me to Proverbs 18:8-9. These are our verses to study and memorize this week.
Proverbs 18:8-9 The words of a whisperer are like dainty morsels, And they go down into the innermost parts of the body. 9 He also who is slack in his work Is brother to him who destroys.
Introduction
In Proverbs 18 we are being given guidance on using our tongues. Our current section, going to verse 14, mainly focuses on negative uses of the tongue and the causes of evil there. In the first four verses of the chapter we saw how powerful desires, prideful self-esteem, wicked hearts, and the deceitful nature of people all result in dangerous, sinful words. Then in Proverbs 18:5-7 we saw how injustice twists words and how violence and ruin are the result of the fool’s words. Now in verses 8-9 we will see just how enticing and dangerous the gossiping, grumbling, complaining tongue truly is.
Has someone ever complained and grumbled to you about someone else and as they began privately sharing the situation it felt good, intriguing, and rather interesting to listen? Maybe hearing the particular details allowed you to vicariously picture the situation, or maybe it completely changed your perspective on the other person. Perhaps you took a certain bit of a pleasure in hearing of the other person’s wickedness which justified your opinion of them. Perhaps it made you feel better about yourself. Maybe it allowed you to commiserate with your friend and share in their anger at the other person. Through it all, the details of what was shared sunk deep into your heart and affected your thinking about the situation and person.
To help us deal with this kind of thing, in verse 8 we are going to see how enticing the gossiping, grumbling, complaining tongue can be. Then in verse 9 we are going to see how destructive it is when someone intentionally uses their tongue to attack and undermine people. These verses we will show us how the desire for gossip, the desire for revenge, and laziness can cause many dangerous, foolish words. Let’s now take a look more closely at Proverbs 18:8-9.
8 The words of a whisperer are like dainty morsels, And they go down into the innermost parts of the body.
It feels good to hear about the secret things of other people, but it affects us to the core of our being. This proverb highlights the enticement of gossiping words.
Through our study of Proverbs we have seen 3 different words for gossip. In Proverbs 11:13 and 17:9 we saw a word used that had to do with a talebearer who repeated a matter. There the tilt of the meaning had to do with being a slanderer. Leviticus 19:16, in the law, forbid this kind of behavior. This slander seems to have an element of sharing something that was secret with the intent to cause harm.
In Proverbs 10:18 a different word was used that also had to do with slander. It has a bit more of a focus on bringing back an evil report about someone, such as by the 10 spies who brought the bad report after spying out Canaan (Numbers 13:32-33; 14:36-37), or of Joseph reporting his brothers bad behavior (Genesis 37:2).
In Proverbs 16:28 and now in Proverbs 18:8 we have the third word for gossip. It seems to have at its root the idea of grumbling and complaining. The verb form was used in Deuteronomy 1:27 and Psalm 106:25 of the Israelites grumbling in their tents against God during the wilderness wandering. As a participle here it is used of one who is complaining against someone else. In Isaiah 29:4 it is describing one who used to complain about God’s authority over them in the past, but now is willing to receive instruction. So this word for gossip is not just about passing along information about other people, it is a talking about people while looking down on them. It is with a negative attitude. It is seeking their hurt or overthrow. It is one who is kicking against the authority of those who are over them through their words.
These three words are all quite close in their range of meaning and might be used almost interchangeably. But if it has a more specific nuance in its emphasis here it would be this idea of personally grumbling and complaining within the slander.
The danger of this kind of complaining slander is that it is so enticing to listen to. It is such an important issue to beware of that this proverb is repeated in its entirety in Proverbs 26:22. The context may be slightly different there, as different facets of issues are focused on. But the main point remains very similar. This kind of gossip is very dangerous because of how interesting, attractive, and enticing it is to listen to. Here in our context it comes within a set of verses that emphasize dangerous uses of the tongue and the causes of them.
Gossip tends to be very dangerous because of its enticing nature. Usually there is a secretive aspect, or it begins that way. Because of that there is a camaraderie between those talking. People are made to feel special by being including in hearing about something that other people do not know about. There is also the aspect of its interesting and intriguing nature. Usually there is some kind of salacious element to what has occurred. There is an exposing of some wickedness or supposed wickedness. There can also be the aspect that when someone else is being spoken about negatively grievances are being aired. Those usually stir up the passions of injustice, vengeance, or covetousness. In gossip there can also be the aspect of pride being exalted. Through what is revealed one can see oneself as being better than the other person or as knowing better what should have been done in a situation.
All of these things blend together to make these kinds of gossiping, grumbling, slandering words a dangerous enticement to listen to and share. It is just like that irresistible favorite desert that we cannot help but have at least one little piece of when we see it made available. It just tastes so good in our mouths! Unfortunately, as we keep eating it, it does not just stay that delicious taste in our mouths. It causes us to gain weight. It sticks with us way more than we would like it too. Gossip is the same way. It appeals to so many aspects of our sinful, fleshly desires in subtle ways. But sadly it does not stop affecting us at our initial hearing of it. It settles into the deepest part of us.
While it may seem like gossip is just words, the reality is that it is very dangerous. This kind of gossip is often the cause of further wicked and dangerous words. These kinds of words stick in our minds. We cannot forget them whenever we see or hear of that person. We dwell on these words, and they influence what happens next. Gossip begs to be shared further. When people are grumbling and complaining against someone in authority over them, or against another person that they perceive as having wronged people actions can very often result. Grievances are meditated on, aired, and expanded upon. The bitterness in people’s hearts grows. It can lead to personal confrontations, community riots, and even national revolts. When directed at God it leads to rebellion against Him, His rightful authority, and His moral standards.
Words can start off small, seeming to be almost innocuous, but they can grow to amazingly dangerous proportions. We must not listen to gossip. We must not let it dwell in us. We must root out bitterness and complaining. We must not let it expand and grow. We must not share it. If we do, we end up working towards the downfall and hurt of other people. As Proverbs 16:28 declared, “a slanderer separates intimates friends.”
Before we share something we need to ask what is the purpose of the statements we are making? Is it to complain? Is it to grumble? Is it to hurt the other person’s reputation? Is it to hurt or get back at someone in some other way? Is it to tear them down? Is it to ruin a relationship? Is it to glory in or exalt sin in any way in the situation? Is it to feel justified in rebelling against God’s commands? If so, then it is gossip, dangerous gossip.
Scriptural Example: In Scripture we see an example of this kind of gossip with Miriam and Aaron against Moses. Numbers 12:1-2 explain the situation this way.
Numbers 12:1-2 Then Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses because of the Cushite woman whom he had married (for he had married a Cushite woman); 2 and they said, “Has the LORD indeed spoken only through Moses? Has He not spoken through us as well?” And the LORD heard it.
The rest of the passage then details the Lord’s angry words and judgment on them for their sin. He rebuked them, exalted his relationship with Moses, and struck Miriam with leprosy. But notice the danger of their gossiping, slanderous words. First they complained and grumbled about something they did not like. Whether it was direct, evil racism over the reality that Moses’ wife was black and not an Israelite, or whether there was some other cause for their slanderous gossip the reality was that they spoke against Moses. Instead of rightly dealing with the issue—whether internally in their hearts, or privately and directly with Moses and his wife— they chose to become bitter and go down the route of gossip and slander. They began speaking against Moses. But also observe how it escalated. Their words did not just stay confined to that one issue. They moved to trying to destroy Moses’ leadership and exalt themselves. That is what gossip does. It grows and brings destruction.
Now, in this case God directly intervened, rebuked them, and humbled them. So that nipped things in the bud and prevented them from turning the people against Moses and overthrowing his leadership. But, it is readily visible how dangerous the gossip was here. It turned a brother and sister against their very own brother and almost led to them trying to overthrow his leadership over the people of Israel. Words have consequences and lead to dangerous places. When they began complaining, grumbling, and gossiping they probably had no idea how far it could take them. But it took them that far regardless.
Proverb in Comparison: When we compare this proverb with the rest of Scripture we see that Paul had strong words of warning on what to avoid with our words in 2 Timothy 2:16-18
2 Timothy 2:16-18 But avoid worldly and empty chatter, for it will lead to further ungodliness, 17 and their talk will spread like gangrene. Among them are Hymenaeus and Philetus, 18 men who have gone astray from the truth saying that the resurrection has already taken place, and they upset the faith of some.
Our speech is not to be like the world’s. We are not to let it lead us into ungodliness. Slander, gossip, and lies spread and hurt people like gangrene. What is also instructive here, is that Paul takes time to specifically name two people who were engaging in this kind of behavior. He is also very specific in what their sin was. This lets us know that there is an important difference between speaking the truth for good purposes—even when it means calling out specific people and specific sins—and gossip which tears down and hurts people.
We also see this in 3 John 9-11. John wrote to Gaius about Diotrephes’ sinful behavior in refusing to accept John’s request to help the traveling minister Demetrius. He called Diotrephes’ behavior evil and said he would call attention to his deeds.
So there is a right time to speak of other people’s situations and sin. Not every conversation about other people is gossip. The way we do it and why we do it matter. We should never speak of matters to glory in sin or to hurt people. Rather, we should wisely and carefully speak of things for the purpose of accomplishing good.
What we say should not be “behind people’s back” so to speak. If what we are saying is for someone’s good, then we should have no problem dealing with them over it directly first. If they have received our exhortation and spurned it, then we may need to share it with others to protect them, or to receive aid in calling the sinner to repentance. When we do speak about someone’s situation we need to make sure that we are honest, factual, fair, and are pursuing what is good and right with our actions and motives. These situations, then, would not be gossip, slander, or grumbling. They would be following in line with the command of Ephesians 5:11-13, which says:
Ephesians 5:11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them; 12 for it is disgraceful even to speak of the things which are done by them in secret. 13 But all things become visible when they are exposed by the light, for everything that becomes visible is light.
We should not glory in sin. We should not dwell on unnecessary detail. But we most not cover over sin and become a partaker in evil ourselves. We must warn people where warning is needed. We must protect fellow believers from the sins of dangerous people. We must care enough to pursue calling people to repentance when they sin, following God’s pattern in Matthew 18:15-20.
Truth in Connection: As we connect this to our lives, it becomes clear that we must not grumble, complain, and gossip about people. It may seem a helpful way to let off steam about a situation. But gossip really is extremely dangerous. It can ruin marriages, make enemies of siblings, cause church splits, make enemies of people within nations, and even start wars. We must not engage in it, and we must not listen to it. It will just entice us in and bring us to repeating matters, tearing down other people, and wreaking destruction.
This kind of speech is indeed a foolish way of living that is destroying so many people in our day and age of social media, and mainstream mass media. This verse warns us that it will seem like enjoying an exquisite dessert while we listen to it on our TV’s or from our phones. But in the end it will go down into the deepest parts of us, deceive us, and infect us until we become enslaved to the bitterness, anger, lust, covetousness, and other sins which it exalts. Run to God’s wisdom instead. We must set our minds on things above. We must let the truth set us free from the sin and weights which can so easily entangle us. There may be times and situations where we need to cut ourselves completely off from social media and mass media to be able to refocus, clear our minds and hearts, and make sure that we are walking by the Spirit in our desires, attitudes, and perspectives.
Of course, depending on our lives and situations we probably will need to be generally informed about what is going on. So what is for certain is that at all times and in all situations we must guard our hearts and minds from being infiltrated by the gossip and slander of family, friends, acquaintances, social media, and mass media. We must always work to have our thoughts guided, controlled, and filtered through God’s Word by His Spirit. This is yet another reason why we must let God’s Word dwell in us richly as Colossians 3:16 says. This is why we need to “put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created” us, as Colossians 3:11 talks about.
If you have not trusted in Jesus as Lord and Savior, then that is what you need to do. He alone can free you from your slavery to sin and transform your mind from your pursuit of sin. He alone can purify your tongue and heart. He alone can bring forgiveness of sins and reconcile you to God. Trust Him.
Our next verse, Proverbs 18:9, begins in a rather rare way for the book of Proverbs. It begins with the word “also” in Hebrew. Just as it would in English, this closely connects what is coming with happened beforehand. So this next proverb is closely connected with the one we have been looking at.
9 He also who is slack in his work Is brother to him who destroys.
The person who is lazy in his work is very similar to the one who is a master of destruction. This proverb highlights the danger of laziness.
As we look at this proverb it may not be readily apparent how it connects with what we have just been looking at with the dangers of the tongue and gossip. That is probably why Solomon put this word “also” here. He is forcing us to look back, think about this proverb, and figure out what connections he is trying to make.
To complicate it even more, the proverb itself takes a little bit of thinking about to figure out what is meant. How does being lazy make one a destroyer? To sort this all out, let’s examine what this proverb is saying first. Then we will look to see how it connects with the context.
Usually we think of laziness as being inaction, not an active, aggressive destroyer. However, the reality is that inaction can be a great bringer of destruction when we look at its consequences. In an agricultural economy—without the many safety nets of our society with food stamps, welfare, food pantries, and social security—if one was lazy and did not work when it was needed the result could be absolutely disastrous.
If seeds are not planted at the right time then crops will not grow. If crops are not harvested at the right time then the harvest will be lost. If the sheep are not tended then wild animals will get them or they will get lost. If the figs, olives, or other fruit are not brought in they will rot and be ruined. If the vines are not tended then they will not produce well. If there is no harvest, then eventually there is no food. There will be a famine, and people will starve and die. Laziness can indeed bring great destruction.
In our society it might not always be quite as clear cut, but laziness still leads to much destruction and loss. Lazy people tend to lose jobs or not get good ones. Lazy people tend to have problems that are let go which become much bigger problems for them. By the way, do not hear the reverse from this. Just because someone loses a job, does not have a high paying one, or has a little problem which becomes a big problem does not mean they are lazy. Sometimes things happen which are not directly caused by our actions or inactions. So we need to be careful about trying to reverse apply this. Nonetheless, laziness does cause these kinds of problems which ruin one’s house, vehicles, possessions, jobs, and relationships. It does cause poverty and struggles. Inaction and laziness is indeed a brother to him who destroys.
The words used here for “him who destroys” is a peculiar kind of Hebrew expression. We do not generally speak this way, so it would not be a very good translation, but it could be translated “lord” or “master of destruction.” In Hebrew when a person is described as the “lord” or “master” of something it means they are the owner of it. Or it means something like they are the best at something.
For instance, when Abraham told King Abimelech of Gerar that Sarah was his sister Abimelech took her. That night God ended up coming to Abimelech and warning him, in Genesis 20:3, not to mess with Sarah because she was “lorded of a lord.” That meant she was a married woman who belonged to someone else, not him. Exodus 21:3 and 22 use a similar expression to refer to a husband as “the lord of the woman.” It may seem an odd way of referring to a husband, but those are discussions of hypothetical cases in the law where something related to a man’s wife, for whom he was responsible, was occurring.
In Genesis 37:19 Joseph was mocked by his brothers as the “lord of dreams” when he visited them. Previously he had shared his dream with them of the sun, moon, and stars bowing to him. So now they mocked him as the superlative dreamer. It characterized him in their minds.
In the law, the “lord of the pit” and the “lord of the home” was the one who owned the pit or house (Exodus 21:34, 22:7). The “lord of the loan” in Deuteronomy 15:2 would have been the creditor who made a loan to someone. The “lord of words” in Exodus 24:14 was the one who had a lawsuit against someone. The “lord of the wing” in Proverbs 1:17 was a reference to birds—everything that had mastery over the air. “Lord of the command” was the commander or captain of the guard in Ezra 4:8.
“Lord of the nostril” is an interesting one found in Proverbs 22:34. It refers to a characteristically angry man who is given to flaring his nostril in expressions of anger. Elijah, however, probably earns the title for receiving the oddest use of this kind of expression. He is called the “lord of the hair” in 2 Kings 1:8. Some of our translations try to be really nice to him and say that he wore a garment of hair and had a belt of leather. And that might be the case, but it most likely means he was an extraordinarily hairy man.
Given all that background, when we hear of a “lord of destruction” in Proverbs 18:8, it is talking about someone who was an expert at it. It would be someone who was master of it. It is what characterized them. They were a professional destroyer. A brother of someone like that would not be far behind in expertise at it. That is what a person who is lazy at their job actually is. They are a brother to the master of destruction. As we noted earlier, when we take time to think of how laziness works that description makes sense. Laziness does not usually bring instantaneous consequences. Usually they have to pile up. But, when they do pile up they are overwhelming and bring disastrous results. So while a master of destruction might be expected to cause ruin right away the lazy one simply has a delay in the consequences. But, the result ends up the same: catastrophe.
From this proverb, then, we see the great danger of laziness in our work. We must not deceive ourselves into thinking that the danger will not come just because the consequences are delayed. No, we must realize the actual danger of laziness and make sure that we work hard at our jobs to provide well for our needs, the needs of our family, and for our future responsibilities. The lazy person does not like to think ahead and think of consequences. The wise person takes the effort to think how their actions today will affect the future. Then they plan and act accordingly to what is needed and best.
All that being said, the question still remains. How does this proverb connect back to the dangers of words that we are seeing in this section?
There are direct connections between laziness and dangerous words with the realities of the self-deception that occurs in laziness. The lazy person makes all kinds of excuses to themselves on why they really do not need to do that work right now or very well. It is also worth noting here that to be lazy people usually use their words in speaking to other people to come up with all kinds of excuses on why they cannot come in to work today, or why they did not do what was asked, or why they did not do a good job. All of these connections are true and valid. Laziness does have a way of causing all kinds of dangerous words and lies that lead to great harm. It is another avenue for dangerous words to wreak havoc in our lives. To avoid dangerous words, we need to avoid becoming lazy.
However, there is also another way that this verse connects to what is going on in this section. Think about this. If laziness can be so destructive by one simply not doing anything, or by not doing what needs to be done, then just imagine. How much more destructive would the words and actions be of someone who was intentionally using their words to tear down and destroy someone else! That is exactly what gossip does. So if we are tempted to think that gossip is not really that bad, we are completely missing reality. Since even inaction and silence can at times be so very dangerous then just imagine how detrimental our words will actually be when they are intentionally aimed at hurting someone else.
Have realized this, we now need to notice one more thing. The “also” here in verse 9 finalizes and expands the point of verse 8. Not only is gossip enticing to listen to, but it is actually the “master of destruction” that laziness is a brother to. Gossip is the master destroyer being referred to in verse 9. James describes it precisely in James 3:6.
James 3:6 And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and is set on fire by hell.
To avoid the most dangerous words, this master destroyer, we need to avoid gossip, slander, and complaining.
Scriptural Example: In Scripture we see an example of this proverb on laziness with king Saul when God told him to destroy all of the Amalekites and their animals. The Amalekites were so wicked that God put them under the ban. Israel was not to take any spoils from them. They were under God’s particular judgment for wiping out. Israel was not to be contaminated with their sin in any way. Sadly, Saul was lazy about it. He went to war. He defeated them. But he kept their king alive as a trophy. He also allowed his people to spare the best of the animals. Then when Samuel confronted him about it he made all sorts of excuses and tried to pretend that he had faithfully carried out God’s commands. He was lazy and did what was easiest! He did not push back when the people wanted to spare some of the animals and have a great feast afterwards from it. That led to the loss of his kingdom from his family line. While in the moment it was easiest to go with the flow and allow the people to do what they wanted, in the end the consequences came. And they were irrevocable. God tore his kingdom away from him.
Proverb in Comparison: When we compare this proverb with the rest of Scripture we see that there is nothing new under the sun. Paul had to deal with this same issue with the early church in Thessalonica. So he gave some very clear commands on how we are to live in 2 Thessalonians 3:11-13.
2 Thessalonians 3:11-13 For we hear that some among you are leading an undisciplined life, doing no work at all, but acting like busybodies. 12 Now such persons we command and exhort in the Lord Jesus Christ to work in quiet fashion and eat their own bread. 13 But as for you, brethren, do not grow weary of doing good.
As we have seen, laziness can be very destructive. Paul did not want it to destroy the church and their testimony for God. So he addressed it right away when it became an issue. We are to be industrious people who work to meet our needs and then work to help others. We are not to be busybodies, gossiping about other people’s lives. For some reason laziness often leads to idle words and dangerous gossip and slander. None of that is to have any part in our lives as Christians. Our lives should be the opposite. We are to work and provide for our own needs. We are to live at peace with one another. We are not to be tearing people down with our words, but rather building them up with our actions and help.
Truth in Connection: As we connect this to our lives, we can see how dangerous gossip and slander are as we compare them with how dangerous laziness is. Because of that we must guard both our tongues and our lives. It is not enough to simply try to avoid evil. It is not enough to simply try not to do bad. Laziness has a way of bringing about its own problems even if the consequences are not always immediately obvious. It also often has a way of bringing about our involvement in matters and talking about people and things in ways that are destructive. It very easily leads to gossip and slander. When we embark on that pathway we end up actively working to tear down other people, hurt them, undermine them, and cause problems. Gossip and slander are actually words of warfare against other people.
Like with Miriam and Aaron grumbling can start out small, but it can grow and become very dangerous. Because of that we need to intentionally pursue doing what is good and right instead. We need to look for what God wants us to proactively do with our lives. We need to personally ourselves look for the ministry and service that He wants us to serve in at our stage of life and ability. We are never too young or too old to do this. All of us should apply this. Children can pursue serving and helping instead of gossiping and grumbling. Teenagers, working adults, retired adults, widows and widowers, and even homebound believers can and should actively look to see what ministries and service God wants them to be involved with.
Then we need to busy ourselves in it and not grow weary in doing good. We need to actively work to use our words and actions to help others. We need to actively guard our tongues from gossip and slander by actively working to say and do what is best for others and will truly build them up. How will we use our tongue and our time? How will you use your tongue and time? Let’s commit to intentionally serving God with both our tongues and our time through helping one another and proclaiming God’s redemption in Jesus Christ.
What we are to do remains the same for all of us. How we do it, we each have the privilege of seeing how God has gifted and enabled us throughout the different stages and opportunities of life. Let’s be faithful to it, and enjoy figuring out how we can each best be involved in working good for one another and proclaiming Christ. If you do not yet know what to do next, then try out new things and see what ways God uses.
If you have not trusted in Jesus as your Lord and Savior from your sin, then there is no way that you can do all this. You cannot actually do what is right and good before God. Even our so-called good actions will be tainted by wrong motives, selfishness, pride, manipulation, and other such sinful desires. We are born as sinners, inherited from our parents and ancestors, and we are sinners by action, thoughts, and desires. Because of that we are unable to truly be good. But thanks be to God, though we have rebelled against Him by our sin, He loved us so much that He gave His one and only Son so that whosever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.
We cannot fix our sin problem. We cannot undo what has been done. But, Jesus can take our judgment upon Himself, give us His righteousness, and overcome our sin and death. That is what He did on the cross and by His resurrection. He gives this to us as a free gift. Will you receive it? Will you turn from your sin and trust Him as your Lord and Savior? Will you surrender your life to Him and recognize that in Him alone is life? When we trust Him, He saves us, regenerates us, makes us alive, gives us His Holy Spirit, and starts us on our new redeemed way of life.
Then, by His power we can all day by day take up our cross and follow Him. Are you following Him today? In Him we can turn from laziness, gossip, slander, manipulation, and other evil and walk in His righteousness. We cannot do it on our own. We will face continued temptations. The enticement of gossip will be very strong at times. Yet in Christ we can walk by faith day by day. We can trust God to help us each step. He has promised us His presence through His Spirit. He has given us His Word for wisdom along the way. He has given us the church to be a part of in our service to Him. He has given us purpose for life in making disciples and serving Him. Let’s then use our words to build others up and proclaim the good news of the gospel. May we guard our tongues to speak words that provide grace to the hearers, and may we pursue fruitful lives that meet our needs and allow us to help others as well.
Conclusion
If you have any questions on any of this or want help in coming to know Jesus as your Lord and Savior please come talk with us. We are available. Let’s pray.
© 2024, Kevin A. Dodge, All rights reserved.
Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations taken from the New American Standard Bible® (NASB),Copyright © 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. www.Lockman.org
English (US) · 